AN OPEN MEMO TO ALL THE MEN IN MY LIFE, ok at least the ones who are LDS.

Is Elder’s Quorum (EQ) putting you to sleep? Is High Priest's Group (HPG) challenging your testimony with all its false doctrine? Are you tired of lessons with no preparation, and seemingly no direction? Do you wonder why you are being tortured during the third hour of church by having to spend your time in EQ or HPG when there are so many more productive things you could be doing? Is this some sort of punishment for past wrong doings or just the Lord’s way of seeing if you will endure to the end?

I have the answer for you. DEFECT to Relief Society. That’s right when Sunday School is over just refuse to leave the Relief Society room. You will find in Relief Society a table decorated with a lovely centerpiece, warm and inviting announcements, a well prepared lesson that actually stays on topic, interesting and spiritual discussion, plus the scenery and smell is not bad either. On a good day you might even get a hand out or a treat. All of this is courtesy of the over preparation, perfectionist syndrome we Mormon sisters have had inbred in us since our days spent in Young Women. (Trust me on this if you think RS is overdone, spend ONE Sunday in YW). You don’t have to make your defection permanent. Just let the Bishop, EQP or HPGL know that you will be happy to return once the message is conveyed to the teachers that the purpose of EQ and HPG is to actually study the gospel, and not discuss false doctrine or the philosophy of men. In the mean time while your leaders are scratching their heads, wondering if this is covered in the General Handbook of Instructions you will enjoy the love and sisterhood of Relief Society.

If you really want to make a statement, don’t defect, just put on a dress and wig, come to Relief Society and introduce yourself as a new sister in the Ward. You will really get the royal treatment then. However I must caution you, that might actually be covered in the General Handbook of Instructions, and not in a positive way…..